Edit Schmedit

I obviously was quite tired last night when I posted - and I didn't think to push the spellcheck function. So, while I could go back and edit, I think I'll just acknowledge that what you got from last night was truly me - unedited...mistakes and all.

I also should say that as I was writing I thought it was a pretty positive post, but as has been pointed out to me (and after rereading it, I do agree) it doesn't come off that way.

Ah well.

The Bable of What's Going On

Since I last posted I've been on the lower end of the mood spectrum. A combination of overwork, underplay, yearning for some specific kinds of relationships I don't have, and just plain old questions of purpose.

Last week was especially low. But, I don't want to talk about that.

This week was much better. And, I've had fun. Many times. I needed some of that grounding.
Tuesday night - went walking with a (non-church) friend.
Wednesday night - had a fun time with a (church-related) friend over margaritas.
Friday night - the friend who was "the-only-friend-who-lived-here-that-knew-me-before" and now has turned into "the-only-friend-who-used-to-live here-that knew me before" was back in town for the weekend and gathered a group of her friends (most of whom are now my friends too) for dinner.
Saturday - a huge interfaith service day where I got to be the cool adult (although the organized one who made them count off). They weren't to the point of testing boundaries with me yet - and I so love that part of a youth to adult relationship when they revel in the fact that you care about them and so that's the most important action - caring. (Plus, for some reason the 3 youngest kids (6-8 year olds...all three Muslim) decided I was really cool and followed me around all day and kept asking "do you need any help?" and thought it was awesome that I was the religious leader at my church.)
Then tonight - a recently acquired friend's birthday party (Sue - I went to duckpin bowling!) - and having a good time with all her eclectic friends. By the way - I rock at duckpin bowling.

In a week I go away for a few days. And, I need it. I am exhausted. I am feeling crabby with my tried and true ones who just want some support. I don't feel like I can support them at the moment. I'm having a hard enough time supporting my own self. I haven't had more than one day off in a row since February.

This is simply spurting out what's in my head. Nothing profound. (Although I may post soon about automatic shut offs). Almost a reminder to myself that sometimes I do have good days - even after hard ones.

Some Days...

Some days can hold me for an entire week. Yesterday was a fun, exciting, somewhat momentous day - one that might hold for even longer than a week.

Yesterday I:
- started the morning walking with a new friend
- got my oil changed and a new battery put in my car (In my opinion the battery could have waited until next winter, but knowing me I wouldn't do it until the battery died and then that would take a ton of time. So, I'm telling myself I just saved time and headache.)
- met with a real estate broker...haven't committed to anything yet - but at least I know what I'll be looking towards and what is possible
- bought two books with a gift certificate
- drove home with my window open and music blaring
- got my taxes mailed off...and my estimated taxes...without going into the account that I set up recently to save money for my taxes (!) (it's because I got enough back from my 06 taxes that it covered some of my first estimated payment for 07). Also got my checkbook up to date and (I'm fairly certain) all of my bills paid.
- did two loads of laundry
- did dishes
- had a wonderful night out with a friend - dinner at a nice restaurant that she and I have been attempting to go to for a little while and then to the HILARIOUS musical "I Love You, You're Perfect, Now Change"

It was good and I've got to celebrate that, especially as I look forward to this upcoming day that needs total creativity and work (haven't even started my sermon, or the speech I give next Wed, or the Bible Study I lead tomorrow). Well, here I go - hopefully buoyed up by yesterday, I plan to take on this weekend. Here goes...

The Downside of an Extraordinary Life

I visit a woman who most people would characterized as having "lost it." She talks about knowing the Queen of England and other important people. She has told me of her great importance in many different incredible circles. Every time I visit her she tells me she's going home that day. Her world is extremely different than the one I, and most other people, live in.

Today though, her world was a bit more honest with mine. Her world was most likely the same for her. But, today she told me that it's really hard because people don't believe her.

She's bright - I think in her early 60's. And she knows that people don't believe what she believes. Since she started allowing me to visit (the first few times I tried really aggrivated her) I have gone in with an eagerness of hearing about her world. I simply ask her to tell me more about what she is thinking about. It's not my job to contradict her. And, her theology is always right on (which would be my job).

I had previously thought that she was somewhat oblivious to the way she might be perceived. But, she's not. And I feel sad that she's not.

Maybe it's not so easy to live an extraordinary live.