I had an interaction yesterday that bugged me. And, it was glaringly obvious that my role in the interaction was what bugged me. It was also glaringly obvious that the reason the interaction happened at all was due to the other person's insecurities.
I don't think it's always true, but I do believe that most of the time we like someone or something based upon how it makes us feel. If someone makes us feel intelligent or like we have worth, we appreciate that person. If we feel as if they don't really care to know about us we feel indifferent or even dislike him or her.
But, do those people that make us feel like they care really care? Or, are they just better at playing the game of schmooze.
I think I'm fairly good at the game of schmooze. I have begun to realize lately though, that I do disregard some people without really realizing it. I might be fully aware of the person, but choose not to put the energy into an interaction.
At some continuing ed in July I sat down next to one of my classmates and asked him how his week had been. Instead of answering my question he said "You want to sit next to me? I thought you didn't like me!" To be honest, I found some of his actions a little annoying, and I didn't fall into the youngish crowd's way of cliquishly doing things - so I may have avoided some of them. But, I had not consciously thought of avoiding him or whether I liked him or not. But, what did I communicate to him? I obviously communicated something that did not affirm him.
I wonder if I do this in my congregation as well. I've been thinking about how I make people feel.
1 comment:
You cannot always know how everyone will percieve your actions but need to trust people will give you the benefit of the doubt. You can only control how you act and how you percieve others. The person you encountered focused more on your actions instead of what he could do. Just because someone is more willing to voice his/her opinion on something does not make him/her more right.
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