Can't get a fix

I'm hoping that by the time my brother might read this, what I'm about to write will be one of those stories you tell and not still an uncomfortable memory.

My younger bro and his wonderful girlfriend are currently flying over the Atlantic Ocean and will land in London, hopefully around 4:30am our time. They came into Milwaukee yesterday and spent the night with me until I brought them to O'Hare this afternoon.

It was wonderful to see them before their adventure...but, both became extremely sick in the night. Not only did they have no food in their stomachs, not only were they unsure about how much they could keep down, but they also had very little sleep. And, then their plane sat on the runway for an hour and a half prior to take off.

Yes, they will survive. Yes, they're heading first to London for about a week and a friend's home from college - so they'll not only know the language, but at least will know a friendly face. But (and now it becomes about me...), I've got this pit in my stomach.

Last night and this morning I've just wanted to make it all better - to make it more comfortable for them. I wanted to give them the time to sleep it off, to not be anxious about an 8 hour plane ride, to take away the upset stomach. I couldn't do any of it. I couldn't fix a thing. I hate that.

I'm praying for D. and B. tonight - that they might be able to rest on the plane. That they might be able to keep some food down (and the food will taste alright). That they are safe and comfortable. That they'll find their way to the place they are staying easily. That their entire trip is much better than this beginning.

I guess, prayer is about all I can do.

Pre-written

This week, like many recently, was all about finishing something in time, but with no extra lag time. I'm just barely pulling it through.

I am grateful for this blog - and the opportunity to put metaphor to my life differently than I do elsewhere - because I just stole the majority of the previous blog about tools for my newsletter article. I changed it and had it talk about tools for returning to God during Lent, but because I had previously written the story out, it flew out of me so quickly that the newsletter article was done in no time.

Now, if only there was a way for my taxes to be done that way.

Having the Right Tools

Earlier this month I bought this from IKEA. It's been partially put together in my living room since I got it home. It seems I was missing a particular tool (maybe an awl?) that would make it easier to put the wheels on.

I persistently worked on the screws enough that I had stripped one and didn't really want to torture my hands any more than I already had, so I decided I needed an electric screwdriver. I thought about buying one, but have not made it to the store to even price them or do any research, and I would think I'd like to know what I was getting into with something like that.

So, I finally borrowed one and got the wheels on....only to have multiple other problems that finally got (almost) figured out. I love doing this kind of building-by-number thing...and could see myself getting into further projects that don't come with ready-made pieces. But, I really need the right tools.

So, as many of these posts go, this too goes back to how I'm managing at my job. February has been so much better than January. People are starting to know of some of the happenings in January - and that feels a little bit like wading through some unknowns as to how to lead. BUT - I do feel like I have some competent, good, newly-in-place "tools" in the form of people who are stepping into certain positions.

Before now I feel like I've been trying to do every single job with a Phillips Head Screwdriver and a hammer...my tool box is expanding...I just hope these new tools feel competent, challenged and fulfilled.

Sunday Wishes

It's the same story every week.

On Thursday I say, "I'll get it done Saturday."

I get the big stuff done on Saturday.

But, on Saturday, I say, "I'll get all the odds and ends done on Sunday."

And then I wake up worrying that I'll forget the odds and ends and have little bits of paper all over the place and multiple e-mails to myself.

I wish I was more organized. I wish I could look forward to Sunday morning for what I hope it is for everyone else. I wish this could all be more laid back.

Insider

I was allowed in tonight - into a frigid camp under a freeway.

I was allowed in tonight - into the pain of a father's concern for his (grown) son whom no insurance company will accept - and whose medication costs $1500 a week.

I was allowed in today - into excited expectation for the coming role.

I was allowed in today - into the homebound woman's fears...even if she won't allow me in her home.

I admit, I take some joy and glee at reading celebrity gossip rags. I also enjoy many different forms of reality television. In some ways, each of these are ways people are allowed into others' lives.

I think I have it better being allowed in to real people's lives.